Being adaptable

The change in my life at Newbold to now makes me think quite a lot.

In so many ways it is different. The most obvious changes are of course the fact that I lived alone in England, but now I am back in the embrace of my family. I have my dogs around, the weather is significantly different, ... well, the list is endless, really.

When I think about it, since my childhood I have been living in different worlds. There was the world where my parents lived and then there was the world of my grandparents, on the farm. Perhaps this is the reason why I have relatively little problems adapting to new circumstances even in my late fifties. Yes, I am used to certain things, but I can also get used to something totally different. At Neewbold I lived in one room with shared bathroom and kitchen for two years. Not always fun and not always handy, but it did not pose a significant probem to me. Well, eventually I gave up on the kitchen and the washing machine was an issue... but I adapted.

My thought is this. Does adaptability of a person say something about their character? Surely you would say that a healthy character (I didn't want to use the word "strong") has certain principles and the person would abide by them. These principles can be so manyfold. They could be overarching, like to be kind to other people and yourself, or more detailed, like being vegan or listening to Country music. Now, if someone is adaptable, they woul dbe willing to negotiate their principles. If the circumstances change, some principles might need to change as well. Is that a good thing or not?

The answer is probably "Yes and No". Or "It depends". Excessive adaptability might be called co-dependence. A co-depencendent person would not order first from the menu in a restaurant. They would wait until at the end and choose what would be easiest for the chef to cook together with what the others of the party had ordered. Is that healthy? Why not? If the person really has no food preferences that day this could be called being considerate.

This is my point, there are no simple answers to this. There is no "one size" in life. It is amazing how well we humans in general can adapt to situations which are sometimes even detrimental (hunger, poverty, extreme weather conditions, etc.). On the other hand, this adaptability could lead to numbness where a person gets used to a situation which is not good for them and action should be taken. I think particularly of people being in toxic relationships or any kind.

So, the bottom line is probably this. We live our lives and we are "in" our lives. But sometimes it might be helpful and healthy to step out of our lives and look at ourselves from afar and evaluate what we are doing. Perhaps with the eyes of someone else. Our parents, our children, or even God. This might reveal something about us which could help us to understand better who we are. 

Last modified onSaturday, 12 August 2017 11:37
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